Soldiers take pride in their commitment to service, even long after that service is complete. Usually, veterans relish the opportunities to come together and tell their stories of youth and glory. So, why do these same veterans forego opportunities to share their stories with a larger audience? At a recent reception in Washington DC found myself surrounded by a cluster of military officers from Central Europe. Some of them were still active, and some were not, but all of them had a chest full of ribbons, medals and accolades attesting to their days of service since past. It occurred to me that I had seen more deployments than some of them and more combat than all of them. So why was I the only one not wearing any military decorations?
It may seem strange that a soldier, who spent his years in service overachieving for as many medals possible, will bury those same medals deep in his closet as soon as he is discharged. The relationship between the American soldier and the public is a complicated one. There is no federal law which describes the method of wearing military medals and decorations with civilian clothes for veterans, although regulations state that veterans may wear medals on civilian clothing on Veteran’s Day, Memorial Day, and Armed Forces Day, as well as at "formal occasions of ceremony and social functions of a military nature." Yet, even if validly authorized, there are essentially three reasons that a veteran would rather not display his medals in public.
First, veterans view their service on a continuum of conflict from the Revolutionary War to present. In that context, the wars of today in both Iraq and Afghanistan seem to be lacking either the outright victory of World War II or even the magnitude of conflict in Vietnam. Compared to veterans living from those wars, Iraq and Afghanistan veterans often (mistakenly) feel that they have done precious little to justify their medals. Case in point, I received an award for fighting through a particularly nasty ambush in 2004. My great-uncle received the same award for surviving a parachute jump at Normandy. Like countless others, I hardly consider myself worthy of the legacy that these awards imply.
Second, wearing your medals destroys the anonymity that allows veterans to opt in and out of discussions about war, national security, and veterans issues. Iraq and Afghanistan dominate our foreign policy talk, along with additional military action in Libya, Yemen, Somalia and Uganda. People love to engage in speculation about what the military should and should not do. Often, there are veterans within earshot of these conversations, but they elect to remain silent. Veterans have complicated views on warfare, and their opinion is likely to be well-reasoned and nuanced. It is also likely that their view may deviate significantly from what you expect. In order to avoid having to explain over and over that soldiers don’t like war, and that invading another country is not a good idea, most veterans quietly shade themselves into obscurity by dressing and acting like a civilian.
Third, veterans are keenly aware of the latent discomfort that America has with its Army. Yes, there are a number of yellow-ribbon charities and activists and the ubiquitous “thank you for your service,” but deep down America would rather not know too much about her warriors. The causes for this are many and varied. Children of WWII vets learned to never ask questions of their fathers, and the baby boomers suffer from a generation of Vietnam Guilt. The result is a population who either sees veterans as silent, unapproachable loners, or traumatized fighters destined for a life of emotional disorder and emptiness (just like in the movie Platoon). Never mind that today’s veterans are the professional and well-educated. Why try to face down fifty years of societal conditioning to prove that you are a different kind of veteran, when it is just easier to blend in.
Notwithstanding any of the above, America would be a better place if our veterans pinned on their medals with same aplomb that they did when they were still serving. Veterans of all wars can contribute to society by getting over their own relative discomfort and identifying themselves to the world as veterans. Failure to do so means that the American public will continue to define veterans, as they have in generations past, through fear and skepticism. Who can blame them when the only veterans they see self-identifying are those struggling financially or emotionally. So, you are fortunate enough to be doing well, and you find yourself at an appropriate event, don’t be afraid to show that you are a veteran - society will be better for it.
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